Funny 70th birthday jokes

Good Gift. Henry was sitting at a bar. He was totally depressed. The bartender, serving him a drink, asked what was wrong. “I’ll never understand women” said Henry. “The other night on my birthday, my wife said as my gift, I could do with her what I wanted.” “Wow! That’s quite some gift” said the bartender. “So why are you so ...

So, let’s celebrate this special occasion with a collection of hilarious 70th birthday jokes that capture the essence of reaching this remarkable age. From forgetfulness to physical limitations, these jokes highlight the unique experiences and perspectives of those who have reached the age of 70. Get ready for a good laugh as we explore the ...Sep 30, 2023 · He wanted to make his 70s “bloom” with laughter! What do you call a 70-year-old grandpa at a rock concert? A fossil fan! Why did grandpa always carry a pencil at 70? In case he made a “senior” mistake! How does grandpa stay fit at 70? He lifts his grandkids’ spirits! Why did grandpa become a stand-up comedian at 70? A: Open the fridge, put the giraffe in, and close the fridge. Q: What are the four steps to putting an elephant in the fridge? A: Open the fridge, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, and close the fridge. Q: Today is the lion king’s birthday party. All …It’s an awful thing to grow old by yourself. My wife hasn’t had a birthday in seven years. Robert Orben. The young man knows the rules, but the old man knows the exceptions. Oliver Wendell Holmes. I am getting to an age when I can only enjoy the last sport left. It is called hunting for your spectacles. Edward Grey.Happy birthday, gramps! You’re looking good for your age! They say that wisdom comes with age… so you must be pretty darn wise by now! Happy birthday, old man! You don’t look a day over 40. Oh you’re turning 37, well happy birthday anyway, you look good! Happy birthday you old fart!It’s an awful thing to grow old by yourself. My wife hasn’t had a birthday in seven years. Robert Orben. The young man knows the rules, but the old man knows the exceptions. Oliver Wendell Holmes. I am getting to an age when I can only enjoy the last sport left. It is called hunting for your spectacles. Edward Grey.To wish somebody a happy birthday in Gaelic, all you need to say is "La Breithe Shona Dhuit!" (Law breh-ha shun-ah ditch) Or in other words: "Happy Birthday to You!" Funny Irish Birthday Blessings. One humorous way to toast somebody having a birthday is to refer to age and health. But make sure you choose the moment wisely! Here are some …

Keep that smile. Keep going the mile. You're young at heart. Even if you have more farts. Funny Birthday Poems. We all age, and for some of us, it is not a problem. But for others, aging is a big deal. You can find more poems on aging to share with others. Happy Birthday Don't Be Blue. Funny 70th Birthday Wishes for Sister. Life can be very funny at times. I never knew you will make it till this day, because of your illness. ... You keep making me happy and laugh with your jokes. I am very proud of you, dear sister. You keep living a good life. Happy 70th birthday. 36. I want you to ask me for anything today, and it is done ...A 70th birthday is a special time that should be celebrated by family and friends. Hosting a party for your loved one is a perfect way to highlight their incredible life so far. On your birthday, I celebrate you and the wonderful person you are. You bring joy to my life and I cherish you more than you know.So whether you're looking for turning 30 jokes, funny birthday puns for a friend who's turning 30 soon, or just want to laugh at yourself, you've come to the right place. Below, we've compiled a lengthy list of 30th birthday jokes, jokes about getting old(er), and just witty adult jokes. Take a look at the funny jokes we have gathered, and let ...Funny Birthday Wishes Images in Hindi. बर्थडे का गिफ्ट तो देंगे तुमको, पर उसके बदले बर्थडे की पार्टी भी लेंगे।. मेरे प्यारे दोस्त. लाखों में मिलता है तुझ जैसा ...Retirement Ideas. Happy Retirement. Retirement Messages. The Senility Prayer. A great cake for a retirement party for a lady... Jul 11, 2017 - Explore Alice Adler's board "70th Birthday Funny Quotes" on Pinterest. See more ideas about 70th birthday, funny quotes, birthday.

Quotes to wish Happy Birthday to the young-at-heart set, those turning 70 or thereabouts. A bunch of funny quotes plus some serious as well. “Like a lot of fellows …You’re like a fine piece of cheese – the older you get, the more you smell, but people still love you. Happy birthday! Don’t worry, [insert age] isn’t so bad. It’s just a little closer to [insert age plus 20]. …Funny 69th sixty nine birthday greeting card his her funny mum dad 1954 70th men women grandad grandma nan important notice joke. (304) £3.99. 70! How The F**K Did That Happen Card - 70 Card - 70th Birthday Card - Funny Birthday - Joke Birthday Card - Seventieth Birthday Card. (781) £3.95. FREE UK delivery.Funny Birthday Wishes Images in Hindi. बर्थडे का गिफ्ट तो देंगे तुमको, पर उसके बदले बर्थडे की पार्टी भी लेंगे।. मेरे प्यारे दोस्त. लाखों में मिलता है तुझ जैसा ...Happy birthday, wishing you a wonderful celebration. ——. Faith, union and patience are the secrets of progress. I wish you to remain firm on these golden principles throughout your life. Happy Birthday. ——. Happy Birthday To My Wonderful Co-worker. Wishing you all the success and happiness in the world! ——.Ideas for throwing a 70th birthday party include having a decade-themed party, celebrating the decade the guest of honor was born in and having a party with the number 70 as the central theme.

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It would be so much easier to get you the perfect birthday gift if you'd just buy one yourself. Happy birthday! Smart, good-looking, and funny. But enough about me. Happy birthday! An amazing watch, a sexy outfit, a souvenir cap, or the latest PS2 game—I was wondering what I could buy you for your birthday. Don't get too excited, though. Funny 70th Birthday Messages. 70-year-olds are always funny. They tell jokes, play with kids, and even sing at family gatherings. So whatever funny word you say, it will undoubtedly leave a sweet impression in their heart. Send one of the following funny 70th birthday wishes and quotes to someone turning 70 years old. Happy 70th Birthday!100+ Hysterically Funny Happy Birthday Memes of 2022. by TheBirthdayBest. Birthday gifts, greeting cards, and parties are great. But birthday memes are life! Memes are a lighthearted and creative way to greet your closest friends and family on their birthday. Heck, send birthday memes even to your co-workers if you’re really tight.So don’t forget to vote for these lame puns and tell us which ones did you like the most! #1. Forget about the past, you can’t change it. Forget about the future, you can’t predict it. Forget about the present, I didn’t get you one. Report. 76 points. POST.Happy 70th birthday! With 70 candles on your birthday cake to blow out, you won’t have to exercise your lungs for a month. (Unknown) Happy 70th birthday! Don’t look so glum. At least you’re not 80. (Unknown) Happy 70th birthday! Don’t be sad about your age. In dog years, you’d just be 10 years old. (Unknown) Happy 70th birthday!

Jan 12, 2022 · - 12 Jan 2022 Celebration For a long time, senior citizens have been known to be some of the funniest people around. They have a different outlook on life and some of their jokes are something you would have to get older to understand. This blog is a compilation of turning 70 jokes from across the country. What are some funny 70th birthday jokes? 70th Birthday Jokes An Old Lady Checked Into A Motel on her 70th birthday. A man gives his wive a coffin for her 70th birthday, When she turns 71, she asks “why havent you got me a present?” And the man answers “but you Lucille went to a hotel. Lucille decided to give herself a big treat for her ...Funny Birthday Gifts Baseball Cap for 50th 60th 70th 80th Men Women, Old Lives Matter, Vintage Adjustable Washed Cotton Hat. 359. 50+ bought in past month. $2099. Save 10% with coupon (some sizes/colors) FREE delivery Thu, Aug 17 on $25 of items shipped by Amazon. +4 colors/patterns. Jul 8, 2023 · So, let’s celebrate this special occasion with a collection of hilarious 70th birthday jokes that capture the essence of reaching this remarkable age. From forgetfulness to physical limitations, these jokes highlight the unique experiences and perspectives of those who have reached the age of 70. Get ready for a good laugh as we explore the ... Funny 69th sixty nine birthday greeting card his her funny mum dad 1954 70th men women grandad grandma nan important notice joke. (304) £3.99. 70! How The F**K Did …Happy birthday! You know you’re getting old when your candles cost more than your cake. - Unknown. May your birthday be filled with joy… and wine. - Unknown. Happy sweet sixteen or multiple thereof. - Unknown. Happy birthday to one of the few people whose birthday I can remember without a Facebook reminder. - Unknown.What are some funny 70th birthday jokes? Some funny 70th birthday jokes are a joke about a woman's age and her dress size and a joke about a man buying his wife decks of cards for her birthday because the. Its been a funny year With good happenings and bad Life isnt. These are examples of funny things to write in a 70th birthday card.Handmade Personalised 70th Birthday Card - Got to Keep Things Moving! - hilarious leg pull card for a significant birthday! (576) £4.75. FREE UK delivery. Funny birthday card for men & women of a certain age. Energy bill crisis themed card perfect for grumpy old dads, mums 50th, 60th, 70th year.Funny 70th Birthday Present, Gift for 70th Birthday, Accent Coffee Mug, Gift for Grandma, Gift for Grandpa, Gift for Mom, Joke Gift for Dad. $15.27. I Thought About Getting You A Funny Card... - Funny Joke Rude Insult False Teeth Old Age Birthday Card 40th 50th 60th 70th - UK Made. (9.6k) $5.68.80 Funny Birthday Wishes. iStock. 1. May you live to be so old that the very sight of you terrifies babies and ex-lovers. Happy birthday! 2. It’s your birthday, the anniversary of the day you ...1: You tell them that you went to the museum, saw dinosaur bones, and thought of them. 2: For their birthday you offer to help them blow out the candles. 3: On their birthday you tell the fire department that if they see a large fire, not to water it down because soggy moist cake is no good.1 0 70th Birthday Jokes for Grandfather Why did grandpa start a garden at 70? He wanted to make his 70s “bloom” with laughter! What do you call a 70-year-old grandpa at a rock concert? A fossil fan! Why did grandpa always carry a pencil at 70? In case he made a “senior” mistake! How does grandpa stay fit at 70? He lifts his grandkids’ spirits!

One of the first-rate methods to find complimentary and high-quality funny 30th birthday cards printable free downloads is to start by seeking online. The internet is home to a expanded variation of websites that offer free funny 30th birthday cards printable free downloads, along with templates, coloring pages, and more.

Senior Citizen Jokes:"Highway Driving". As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his cell phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife's urgent voice warning him, "Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Interstate 77. Please be careful!”. "Hell!" said Herman, "It's not just one car.Mar 22, 2023 · You’re like a fine piece of cheese – the older you get, the more you smell, but people still love you. Happy birthday! Don’t worry, [insert age] isn’t so bad. It’s just a little closer to [insert age plus 20]. Happy birthday! You’re like a classic book – everyone still loves you, even if you’re a little outdated. Mom: Honey, that’s ok, I have one in the cupboard. You: More like you had one in the cupboard – sorry! Wake up mom, it’s your birthday – the only day I wake up before you. I’d sleep in if I could, but I always forget to get you a card. Thank God …It Took Me 70 Years To Look This Good Mens Adult Unisex T-Shirt Tee Milestone Birthday Celebration Funny Novelty Gift 70th. (8.5k) £9.89. £10.99 (10% off) FREE UK delivery. Seven-tea! Funny 70th Birthday T Shirt - Funny 70th Gift For Tea Lovers. Happy 70th birthday! With 70 candles on your birthday cake to blow out, you won’t have to exercise your lungs for a month. (Unknown) Happy 70th birthday! Don’t look so glum. At least you’re not 80. (Unknown) Happy 70th birthday! Don’t be sad about your age. In dog years, you’d just be 10 years old. (Unknown) Happy 70th birthday! Mom: Honey, that’s ok, I have one in the cupboard. You: More like you had one in the cupboard – sorry! Wake up mom, it’s your birthday – the only day I wake up before you. I’d sleep in if I could, but I always forget to get you a card. Thank God the supermarket is open early.Happy birthday! Now that you're old enough to be a father, I have only one thing to say to you: Live long enough to be a problem to your children. Happy birthday! Some people drink from a glass half empty and some drink from a glass half full. It’s your birthday, so drink as many glasses as you want.Happy 70th birthday! With 70 candles on your birthday cake to blow out, you won’t have to exercise your lungs for a month. (Unknown) Happy 70th birthday! Don’t look so glum. At least you’re not 80. (Unknown) Happy 70th birthday! Don’t be sad about your age. In dog years, you’d just be 10 years old. (Unknown) Happy 70th birthday!

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One of the first-rate methods to find free and high-quality humorous birthday free printable funny birthday cards for coworkers downloads is to start by seeking online. The internet is home to a broad variation of websites that offer free humorous birthday free printable funny birthday cards for coworkers downloads, along with templates ...Draw an eye on a ladies’ sanitary pad. Voilá, you can give them an iPad now. Your upcoming birthday reminds me of the words of the old Chinese scholar: Yung No Mo. Little Johnny: Thank you, grandpa. The violin you gave me for my last birthday already brought me a lot of money. -.60 means being carefree… just a little more forgetful. You can't regret what you can't remember. 60 is beauty. Vintage beauty. 60 means embracing the good life. And more naps. Turning 60 is just a new chapter in a long book. 60 means seeing the world differently… through glasses. 60 is like a great meal.Funny 70th Birthday Jokes • Funny birthday jokes Quotes – At the age Not many people to keep me day! “Happy 70th birthday!” • Happy 23rd Birthday beginnings. of age, you're doing well 70th birthday card. Enjoy your special says, Ever! happens in it, relish their new gray. At 70 yearsHere are some of the most funny birthday wishes ever dished out, from old age jokes, to friendly jabs. Make sure to explore the rest of our Birthday quotes and Wishes by following the links below. Sorted Birthday Quotes: Funny – 40th – 50th – 60th – Aging Quotes – Happy Birthday Wishes.List of 22 Birthday Knock Knock Jokes. Discover our hilarious collection of knock-knock jokes about birthdays! Celebrate with our birthday knock-knock jokes, sure to entertain children, teens, and adults. Unwrap the gift of laughter with these comical quips, making every day feel like your special day. Ready to laugh until it's your birthday ... Funny Birthday Wishes Images in Hindi. बर्थडे का गिफ्ट तो देंगे तुमको, पर उसके बदले बर्थडे की पार्टी भी लेंगे।. मेरे प्यारे दोस्त. लाखों में मिलता है तुझ जैसा ...1. What’s the secret to having a smoking hot body as a senior? Cremation. 2. What is a prize old people can win for aging? Atrophy. 3. I used to know a couple who … ….

Do what you enjoy the most as there is no telling what tomorrow brings. —. At 70, you may no longer be sharp or in the best of health. Everything will be fine as long as your spirit is full of wealth. Things may slip out, like farts and naughty words. Living with regret about the past is strictly for the birds. —.Happy birthday to the coworker with the world’s greatest coworker. 7. Happy birthday! You’re one day closer to retirement. 8. Happy birthday to the only coworker I want to hang out with outside of work. 9. Happy birthday, coworker. You’re the only reason I’m still at this job.One of the leading methods to find complimentary and high-quality printable birthday card free funny downloads is to start by seeking online. The internet is home to a broad variation of websites that offer free printable birthday card free funny downloads, including templates, coloring pages, and more.We also have Funny 70th Birthday Joke quotes and sayings related to Funny 70th Birthday Joke. TOPIC. AUTHOR. Close. Search. Close. Search. Close. Search. Close. Search. ... 60th Birthday 40th Birthday Jokes Diplomacy Getting Old 21st Birthday Happy Birthday Happy Birthday Birthday Wishes Marriage Keeping It Real. Show more. …70th Birthday Wishes - Funny & Sincere Wishes for 70th Birthdays. It's not always easy to come up with the perfect thing to say on a birthday card. This list of 70th Birthday Wishes will help you find the perfect sentiment. 🖤 Please CAREFULLY read the points below before purchasing. • This item can be shipped or delivered digitally via email.Catchy 70th Birthday Phrases Keeping up with a girl like you was always hard, and now that you’re turning 70, I’m still in your dust, happy 70th... Don’t think of it like you’re already 70, but that you’re only 70 years old. Thank you for all the happiness we have...Retirement Ideas. Happy Retirement. Retirement Messages. The Senility Prayer. A great cake for a retirement party for a lady... Jul 11, 2017 - Explore Alice Adler's board "70th Birthday Funny Quotes" on Pinterest. See more ideas about 70th birthday, funny quotes, birthday.Balloon Pop Game: Fill balloons with small prizes or jokes and have guests pop them to win. ... fun games for 70th birthday party. Great question! Here are some unique and fun game ideas for a 70th birthday party: Trivia Game: Create a trivia game with questions related to the year the guest of honor was born. You can include questions about ...Old Age Jokes. Laughing can make you live longer. Read up on our old age jokes and “getting old” jokes to live forever. Getting old doesn’t have to be sad. Make fun of those grey hairs with ...70th Birthday Card for Men, Whisky Fan Drinker Bday Gift, 70 Year Old Gifts, Funny Dad Birthday Card, Dad Birthday Joke, Seventy Birthday (4.5k) $ 9.97 Funny 70th birthday jokes, 31. Wanna know how to get 1 million followers get a water bottle and run through Africa. 30. You wanna know how to gain 1 million followers, Run throught the middle of Africa with a piece of bread. #29 – 20. African Jokes. 29. Just met a really hot girl who was from a tribe in South Africa, we just clicked. 28., Old Age Jokes. Laughing can make you live longer. Read up on our old age jokes and “getting old” jokes to live forever. Getting old doesn’t have to be sad. Make fun of those grey hairs with ..., Old Age Jokes. Laughing can make you live longer. Read up on our old age jokes and “getting old” jokes to live forever. Getting old doesn’t have to be sad. Make fun of those grey hairs with ..., Patient: "Doctor, I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake." Doctor: "Next time, take off the candles." One liner tags: birthday, doctor. 78.78 % / 576 votes. When I was young, I always felt like a male trapped in a females body. Then I was born. One liner tags: age, attitude, birthday, puns, women., A man gives his wife an expensive bottle of wine for her birthday. After a few glasses the wife blurts out, “I love you”. The husband responds: “Is that you or the wine talking?”. Wife: “This is me, talking to the wine.”. Man wakes up and says nothing. Wife annoyed shouts, “You’ve forgotten what day it is haven’t you.”., May He be by your side every step of the way on this special day, and every day. Happy Birthday, brother! On your birthday, I pray to Jesus for your health and happiness for your year ahead. I hope you have a blessed day. May your birthday be blessed with His presence and grace., (273) $3.82 Funny 70th Birthday Gift Wrap | For Him Her | Friend | Men Women | Mum Dad Nan Grandad | Aunt Uncle | Wrapping Paper For 70th Birthday (9.8k) $5.35 70th Birthday Card for Men, Whisky Fan Drinker Bday Gift, 70 Year Old Gifts, Funny Dad Birthday Card, Dad Birthday Joke, Seventy Birthday (4.7k) $9.97, , Funny 70th Birthday Card – Hilarious 70 Years Old Anniversary Card – Happy 70th Birthday Card – Hilarious 70th Birthday Card for Lovers or Friend – Red A Envelope (One Card) 91. 100+ bought in past month. $899. FREE delivery Sat, Oct 7 on $35 of items shipped by Amazon. Or fastest delivery Wed, Oct 4. , - 12 Jan 2022 Celebration For a long time, senior citizens have been known to be some of the funniest people around. They have a different outlook on life and some of their jokes are something you would have to get older to understand. This blog is a compilation of turning 70 jokes from across the country., Birthday Knock Knock Jokes List of 22 Birthday Knock Knock Jokes. Discover our hilarious collection of knock-knock jokes about birthdays! Celebrate with our birthday knock-knock jokes, sure to entertain children, teens, and adults. Unwrap the gift of laughter with these comical quips, making every day feel like your special day., For his 70th birthday, one of his students gave the zen master a big box with a ribbon around it. When the master opened the box, he found that there was nothing inside. "Aha," he exclaimed, "just what I wanted!" upvote downvote report. A big list of 70th birthday jokes! 9 of them, in fact! Sourced from Reddit, Twitter, and beyond! , Senior Citizen Jokes:"Highway Driving". As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his cell phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife's urgent voice warning him, "Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Interstate 77. Please be careful!”. "Hell!" said Herman, "It's not just one car. , ... 70 I Am 18 With 52 Years Of Experience 70th Birthday. Tags: Seventy, funny 70th birthday, birthday jokes, Birthday, 70 years old, 70th birthday, Funny Birthday., ২৩ মার্চ, ২০২২ ... These funny birthday jokes will make their big day that much more special. Write these hilarious one liners in their birthday card or use a ..., Draw an eye on a ladies’ sanitary pad. Voilá, you can give them an iPad now. Your upcoming birthday reminds me of the words of the old Chinese scholar: Yung No Mo. Little Johnny: Thank you, grandpa. The violin you gave me for my last birthday already brought me a lot of money. -., No one asked for this. It’s a shiny piece of metal that combines two German favorites: cash and bratwurst with curry sauce. This seemingly priceless combination can be yours for just €13 ($14.90), thanks to the Staatliche Münze Berlin, a mi..., So, let’s celebrate this special occasion with a collection of hilarious 70th birthday jokes that capture the essence of reaching this remarkable age. From forgetfulness to physical limitations, these jokes highlight the unique experiences and perspectives of those who have reached the age of 70. Get ready for a good laugh as we explore the ..., More Funny Jokes & Humor. If you enjoyed our anniversary jokes, you may also like these other pages of laughs: Birthday Puns. Dating Jokes. Divorce Jokes. Flirting Jokes. Funny Birthday Wishes. Funny Quotes …, Happy birdie-day! I know, bad pun (almost as bad as your golf game). 3. Birthdays are like golfing – it’s a lot more fun if you don’t keep count. 4. You’re not “over the hill”, you’re on the “back nine”. Happy birthday! 5. Your head’s starting to look more and more like a golf ball – bald and dimpled., Apr 10, 2023 · 1. What’s the secret to having a smoking hot body as a senior? Cremation. 2. What is a prize old people can win for aging? Atrophy. 3. I used to know a couple who grew fruit trees together. They... , Lighthearted Anniversary Quotes. "Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one." -Anonymous. "Spouse: Someone who'll stand by you through all the trouble you wouldn't have had if you'd stayed single." …, Scotch Whiskey Birthday. Eat More Cake. So Cheesy. Smiley Balloon. Peek A Boo Dog. 8 Bit Level Up. Here's to One Cool Chick. Hot Stuff Birthday. You Still Look 21., To say happy birthday to a golfer, you can use golf-themed wishes or puns. Here are a few ideas: 1. “Wishing you a hole-in-one kind of birthday! May your day be filled with birdies and eagles!”. 2. “Happy birthday! May your swings be smooth, putts be accurate, and your scorecard is full of pars and birdies!”. 3., 1. Why didn’t anyone say happy birthday to the owl? Because it didn’t give a hoot. 2. Did you know that birthdays are good for your health? It’s a scientific fact: People who have more birthdays..., as the golden trips can be • Funny birthday jokes I hope all • Sweet things like look to you nick-name for you, because your restroom “Happy 70th birthday!” Message Guy Pick doubt welcome, here on Earth! • Wives everywhere should • “Old Reliable” is a …, Best 50th Birthday Jokes and Sayings. “The years between fifty and seventy are the hardest. You are always being asked to do things, and yet you are not decrepit enough to turn them down.” ~ T. S. Eliot. “Cultivate friendships with people much older than yourself. This will make you feel so much younger. “Age is a number and yours is ..., Some funny 70th birthday jokes are a joke about a woman's age and her dress size and a joke about a man buying his wife decks of cards for her birthday because the cards contain a lot of diamonds. In this article, we will explore the world. Personalize your own printable & online funny birthday cards for adults and kids., Some funny 70th birthday jokes are a joke about a woman’s age and her dress size and a joke about a man buying his wife decks of cards for her birthday because the cards contain a lot of diamonds., "Today is the viewing." senior breakfast rude joke tie nurse nursing home genitals coat viewing. Dislike Like Medical Puns "PMS jokes aren't funny; period." The Surprise Gift It was a man's 80th birthday and his friends wanted to get him a special gift., 1. Why didn’t anyone say happy birthday to the owl? Because it didn’t give a hoot. 2. Did you know that birthdays are good for your health? It’s a scientific fact: People who have more birthdays..., Happy 70th birthday! With 70 candles on your birthday cake to blow out, you won’t have to exercise your lungs for a month. (Unknown) Happy 70th birthday! Don’t look so glum. At least you’re not 80. (Unknown) Happy 70th birthday! Don’t be sad about your age. In dog years, you’d just be 10 years old. (Unknown) Happy 70th birthday!, Huxters 70th Birthday Card – Funny Birthday Cards for Women and Men – Neigh Horse Joke Happy Birthday Card – Birthday Card for Him and Her – Carbon Neutral Birthday Card with Envelope (70th) £399. Save 5% on any 4 qualifying items. Get it Friday, 29 Sept. FREE Delivery by Amazon.